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The alternative Kiwipidia

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Kiwianarama

The alternative Kiwipidia

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Author: Selwyn Nogood

  • 9 June 2020
  • Selwyn Nogood

The Best Way to Pay Off Debt

Payday loans are sometimes necessary for people who live from paycheck to paycheck. Though this …

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  • 24 April 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Dumb News

If New Zealand network news was dumbed-down any further, the Medical Council could name a …

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  • 7 April 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Tall Poppy Syndrome

Kiwis are by their very nature imbued with a pioneering spirit of self-reliance, hard work, …

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  • 25 March 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

The Appearance Of Being Green

Clean, Green, 100% Pure New Zealand. Our tourism billboards and food export packaging are awash …

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  • 19 March 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Hating Auckland

Auckland. City of JAFAs (which we are reliably informed stands for ‘Joy! Another friendly Aucklander!’). A temperate climate, …

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  • 10 March 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Exercise

Per Capita, New Zealand is officially one of the fittest countries in the world. But Kiwis …

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  • 9 March 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Cowboy Property Development

New Zealand has a great many beautifully preserved character buildings and colonial villas. Ideal locations, …

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  • 28 February 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

The Flat White

Most countries in the world like coffee.  But only New Zealand actually wants to marry …

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  • 27 February 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Correcting Trans-Tasman Nationality Mistakes

The number of Kiwis who really make an impression on the world’s stage, in any …

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  • 22 February 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Choking

Kiwis are really, really good at a small range of minority sports. So good, in …

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  • 16 February 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Public Service Advertising

Kiwis love being told what to do. And then doing the exact opposite. In a, …

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  • 12 February 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Tapas

A recent addition to the bar menus of most New Zealand cities, it seems Kiwis …

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  • 10 February 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Georgie Pie Nostalgia

Georgie Pie – New Zealand’s own answer to McDonalds, featuring meat pies instead of burgers …

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  • 9 February 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

90s-facial-hair

Soul Patches (aka ‘Clit Ticklers’), Goatees & Lamb-chop Sideburns – or any other combination of …

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  • 6 February 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Per Capita Statistics

With the exception of New Years Day on the Millennium, and the climbing of Mount …

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  • 4 February 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Frequent Weather Reports

Nothing happens in New Zealand. Ever. And yet, against all better judgement, both TV networks …

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  • 29 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Reckless Driving

No nation on earth likes a spot of reckless driving quite like the Kiwis. For …

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  • 28 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Dub and/or Reggae Music

New Zealand has never quite recovered from the Bob Marley concert at Western Springs, Auckland, …

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  • 27 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Awkwardly Respectful Pronunciation (of non-English Words)

Aotearoa. The ‘Land of the Long Flat Vowel’. Universally famous for our monotone, deadpan accent. …

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falcor
  • 23 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Taniwha-Based Transport Policy

According to Māori mythology, Taniwha are supernatural creatures – some terrifying, others protective – that …

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  • 22 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Tattoos

As an expression of Kiwi individuality and identity, there’s nothing better than copying other Kiwis …

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  • 22 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Cheap TV Adverts

Small to medium sized Kiwi businesses just can’t seem to get enough of badly produced, …

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  • 16 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

New Zealand T-Shirts

Nothing informs the world of wearer’s modest Kiwi patriotism better than a printed T-Shirt with …

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  • 10 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Taking Ourselves Seriously

Irony has often been a bit of a struggle for Kiwis. We have a hard …

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  • 10 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Kiwiana

Nobody actually eats Hokey Pokey Ice Cream, and they certainly don’t buy it from a …

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  • 10 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Putting New Zealand On The Map

Few phrases, uttered by respected international media pundits, excite Kiwis more than; “This will really …

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  • 9 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Positive Identity Reinforcement

Closely linked with ‘Taking Ourselves Seriously‘, a trait unique to the Kiwi psyche is the …

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  • 6 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Weddings on Beaches

Kiwis are a pretty adventurous bunch when it comes to weddings. Any popular activity pursuit …

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  • 6 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

Leaving New Zealand

Kiwi’s just can’t get enough of New Zealand. They love it. So long as they …

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  • 6 January 2009
  • Selwyn Nogood

The Colour Black

Modest to the point of peity,  Kiwis consider it a sin to ‘stand out’ too …

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Recent Posts

  • The Best Way to Pay Off Debt
  • Dumb News
  • Tall Poppy Syndrome
  • The Appearance Of Being Green
  • Hating Auckland

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