Kiwianarama

"...and then you plant the drugs when she's not watching, like so."

For a country whose primary export is Tourism, New Zealand sure has some clever ways to stop people getting in.

Of course, if there is an irony to New Zealand’s obsession with border control, it is this; arrive at Auckland airport wearing a Burqa and waving a Semtex-smeared copy of the Holy Qur’an, and you’ll be sunning your barely-exposed ankles on Piha beach within the hour. But try to sneak in the un-eaten half of a croissant the airline gave you for breakfast, and expect to be deported to Afghanistan quicker than you can say ‘Death to the Infidels’.

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..I sound like this cause I'm chewing a cigar, alright?

For all the mace & ceremonial robes, the many portraits of ‘Her Majesty’, New Zealand parliament is  one rickety step above a kangaroo court (no pun at the expense of our preternaturally large hind-legged neighbours intended). If the ornate wooden interior of the House of Commons closely resembles the set of the TV show Deadwood, it may be more than mere coincidence.

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Just a pack of raisins, thanks.

New Zealand takes pride in being ‘the world’s guniea pig’. A micro-society, allegedly employed by the large (inverted commas) Corporations and/or Governments of the world to beta test new technologies, or political ideas, before they are released to much larger countries.

A common argument suggests that this is how New Zealand – an otherwise frontier outpost of technological retardation – developed the first near-cashless society, through the early introduction of Eftpos (Electronic Funds Transfer point… oh, you know what is without having to explain the acronym).

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